What I Want To Be When I Grow Up

(1) Fly girl
(2) Agent Scully
(3) Heiress
(4) Sydney Bristow
(5) Lawyer

Class

You know what I hate? I hate it when professors won't just leave me the hell alone. I'm paying 700 bazillion dollars per credit, AND I have to put up with some obnoxious old guy pestering me with questions during class while I'm trying to read my email and ignore the dumbass midwesterner with the loud voice who ends up sitting behind me EVERY goddam semester. If I wanted to participate, I'd sit in the front and raise my hand. Leave me alone!

Why?

How to make your own marshmallows.

Why? Is there something wrong with the marshmallows from the grocery store? There are plenty of foods that taste better "homemade", but I don't think marshmallows are one of them. Also on the list of things that taste better mass-produced in a factory in New Jersey than made with loving care in your kitchen are Twinkies, Pepsi, cigarettes, and cheez wiz.

Kittens Rule!

The new semester starts on Monday. I got my books last week. Today I dove right in and started on the first-day assignments by getting out my highliters, opening the books up to the assigned reading, and spending an hour on YouTube watching videos like "Kitten falls down stairs" and "Kitten falls asleep."

Last. Textbooks. Ever.

Just bought the last set of law textbooks I'll ever buy, for my last semester! Now I can go home and add up my loans and figure out when I'll be able to afford to get tired of being a lawyer and go back to school for a new career.